Ever feel lost in your own skin?
Few weeks back I woke up in in the middle of the night in bed with Kennedy and Major after a wild night of dirty… hot… sticky….. insane sex. Now you would think I’d be tired but I couldn’t sleep a wink I did things to help me.
I turned on the TV and that did nothing, texted everyone in my private phone, watched funny animal videos, read the bible in the nightstand, I even played with myself until a came hoping that would use up the rest of my energy but it did nothing but annoy me.
My last 2 options were a swim in the hotel pool or a hot shower and although I was wide awake I was way too lazy to walk to the pool. I crawled over Major who was snoring like the devil himself and walked over to the bathroom for a shower and caught a glimpse of myself in the vanity mirror.
Smeared lipstick, raccoon eyes from my eye shadow and mascara, bruises on my shoulders and arms from Kennedy and Major squeezing me.
I used to be Morgan a carefree girl who did this job to make sure she didn’t have to live paycheck to paycheck.
I wasn’t the type of girl to hotel hop across the world and play sex games with men for crazy amounts of money. And I damn sure wasn’t the type of girl to be getting DP’d by two men who combined are worth just a little over a billion dollars. The girl in the mirror looked like me, smiled like me, had hazel eyes like me, But this girl I’m looking at is not was not me…… she is not Morgan.
I called up my mum because I knew she’d be up late and she always gave me comfort when I needed and just hearing her say hello was all I needed to start to feel better. She started asking me question about my childhood “Do you remember that day dad got all of you out of school and we spent the day at the beach?” “Do you remember your dance concert when you yelled Mummy I have to pee in the middle of the routine?” We laughed about it and she made a couple of jokes before she had to get some rest.
I laughed about the trip down memory lane with my mum but they weren’t genuine laughs because I had memory of those great moments with my family. Morgan spent every weekend with her family she didn’t lie to them constantly she had morals she didn’t cheat on her boyfriends with sex maniacs in restaurant bathrooms.
The more I looked at this other person the more disgusted I felt with the girl who looked like me.
Yes I was disgusted but yet I still craved what disgusted me……..
Just thinking about the things they would do to me if I simply asked for it made the hairs on the back of my neck stand I looked like an addict shaking from thoughts of my next hit. I stared in the mirror at the bodies in the bed behind me put my hands between my legs and felt how wet I was.
Who is this Morgan I have become? And what have I done with the Morgan I used to be?
The Lives Of The Elite Vixens 